| 個人檔案Eartha's quarter相片部落格清單 |  工具  說明 |
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Eartha's quarterNothing comes from nothing. 31 July Stop it. It ended...It ended a long time ago. Just let it end...let it end...Stop it. Stop it Lydia. You need to stop hurting yourself. 7 February It's been too longI don't know why do I have a MSN space. I never use it>< I prefer my other online journals much better...
2 October HomeworkCan you believe in this?????????
It's the third day of school and hello! first lecture for heaven's sake...and we got a stack of homework!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss my friends>< I want to hang out with them instead of doing homework!!!!!!!
11 June 偷永宁学姐的琵琶吟（歌词） 一曲琵琶吟，惹两眶的泪深深。多少人有痴，多少人有怨，有恨。
稀饭其中的两句：“从此西窗剪烛红袖添香梦成尘，就算弹到万古千秋也留恨。从此天涯海角各自分飞不相闻，一曲琵琶哀怨情愁都弹尽。” 想到当初为什么去学古筝。。。唉。 >31 May RageShi said I am the Death God of microbes, since the eight plates we spreaded had no growth on them. Ever since the isolation experiment I didn't grow any bacteria successfully, which is weird because even if u open the dish for 1 min, there should be some growth.
Haha, so I told her that next time when she eats anything, let me touch it, I can make it sterile.
Maybe it's my long lasting rage burn them dead. I understand why I am so angry, I would say it's human nature, and there are others just like me. But with that said, I still don't want to take it lightly, I am at a dangerous age, and my thoughts should be carefully monitored.
I will call my father after the finals, tell him his worry is realized, haha, I am becoming a 愤青. If his lecture cannot help me, then, I will go to a temple. The calm air and delight music can sure soothe my mind.
Never thought anger is a state of relaxation. ^^ 25 May Aye...It's been too long since I wrote anything here. My life is a mess.
I am happy though, in a strange way. I know I shouldn't have taken too many classes in one term, but I guess I have to do my best...I am not doing my best...
Four classes, two of them I am not worrying about, but the other two scare me. I did just so-so on the first miterms, the second midterm for Pchem is coming tmr, but i didn't study at all...since there is nothing to study about. I did my homework carefully, read the book as prof taught, what else can I do? For the lab...the TA does not seem to like me too much, she always pick on me and I am extra careful when doing the lab. I thought I did great on the midterm but the result is 2 points below the 1st STDV. usually in a class of 2 handreds people, I don't need to try at all to get above most of them, I don't know what got into me...
Final worth a lot...I just have to do my best on the finals><
concert is coming next week...I didn't practice at all. Quarter is going to end soon so I didn't bring my Zheng to my apt, and I am too lazy to go to the practice room everyday.
This term is depressing, I am very glad that I still have my 161D class, the 3 hours on monday night is what kept me sane. Love all my friends there too! 2 May 世界上最远的距离世界上最远的距离 泰戈尔 世界上最远的距离 不是 生与死的距离 而是 我站在你面前 你不知道我爱你 世界上最远的距离 不是 我站在你面前 你不知道我爱你 而是 爱到痴迷 却不能说我爱你 世界上最远的距离 不是 我不能说我爱你 而是 想你痛彻心脾 却只能深埋心底 世界上最远的距离 不是 我不能说我想你 而是 彼此相爱 却不能够在一起 世界上最远的距离 不是 彼此相爱 却不能够在一起 而是明知道真爱无敌 却装作毫不在意 世界上最远的距离 不是 树与树的距离 而是 同根生长的树枝 却无法在风中相依 世界上最远的距离 不是 树枝无法相依 而是 相互了望的星星 却没有交汇的轨迹 世界上最远的距离 不是 星星之间的轨迹 而是 纵然轨迹交汇 却在转瞬间无处寻觅 24 April OH MY GODI hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate pchem,I hate pchem, i hate pchem, i hate! 19 April Fighting a war with myself.Look at Shi and her battle, Look at Kelly and her battle...at least they both got a real enemy.
What's my war? I am fighting againest myself.
Tell me my friends, what is the difference between:
1. I can love him, but I don't want to.
2. I want to love him, but I cannot.
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
3 April 没有安全感"如果，我再平庸一点点，平庸到看不清一些事，我会快乐，因为无知；如果，我再优秀一点点，优秀到可以改变一些事情，我也会快乐，因为无畏。可惜现在的我偏偏处在这么一个上天不得入地无门的尴尬境界，明明很不屑，但也只能眼睁睁的看着，什么也做不了。难怪古人会发出“难得糊涂”的叹息。眼不见为净是个很不错的自欺欺人的办法，把头埋在沙子中，并不是鸵鸟的专利。 "
----从kiki的blog上看到的。。。真好像在说我。 现在无助又没有安全感，只想找谁紧紧的抱着，他能不拒绝我，不推开我。 1 April Spring break is a blast.I love all my friends who brought such a wonderful spring break to me.
I am wild! 21 March Two done, one to go.I thought he is a nice professor...maybe he is, maybe it is a professor's job to make students feel stupid.
17 pages final, all essay questions. Every pathway we have to write all substrate structures and enzyme, co-enzyme names...When the third time I drew malate, I wanted to cry...yeah, should have gone study art, it's drawing anywhys.
I lay on bed the whole day today after the exam, didn't have the strength to even get water. My head hurts so bad and I think I am getting a fever...Hopefully I will be okay tmr...I really don't want to get sick right after all my finals like last quarter. 20 March One done, Two to go...The worst part finished, Parm 110A is too damn hard! I wonder what will happen to me when I take 110B next year. 19 March Finals...Final....
Final....
Final....
FINALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
55555555555555555
Screaming!!!!
Throwing things!!!
Crying!!!!!
Feeling stupid!!!!!!!!!!
I am actually happier than I ever was this year. 2 March 告诉每一个女孩 你必须找到除了爱情之外，能够使你用双脚坚强站在大地上的东西。你要找到谋生的方式，现在考虑不晚了。我从来不以为学历有什么重要，天才都不是科班，但，不是科班，连龙套都跑不了。你必须把那些浮如飘絮的思绪，渐渐转化为清晰的思路和简单的文字。华丽和漂浮都不易长久，你要知道，给予文字阅读快感不够的，内容、思想、境界、灵魂、精神和智慧，这些才重要。 不要琐碎，无病呻吟。不要想到什么就写。不要流于小感伤和小感动。妹妹，我要你相信温暖、美好、信任、尊严、坚强这些老掉牙的字眼。我不要你颓废、空虚、迷茫、糟践自己、伤害别人。我不要你把自己处理得一团糟。 节制自己的感情。不是任何人都能要。体验生活，是另外一回事，并不意味着堕落和放纵。千万不要认同那些伪装的酷和另类。他们是无事可做的人找出来放任自己无事可做的借口。真正的酷是在内心。你要有强大的内心。要有任凭时间流逝，不会磨折和屈服的信念。不是因为在象牙塔中，才说出我爱世界这样的话。是知道外面的黑、脏、丑陋之后，还要说出这样的话。妹妹，好好去爱，去生活。青春如此短暂，不要叹老。偶尔可以停下来休息，但是别蹲下来张望。走了一条路的时候，记得别回头看。 时不时问问自己，自己在干么。 伤心和委屈的时候，要嚎啕大哭，哭完洗完脸，拍拍自己的脸，挤出一个微笑给自己看。不要揉，否则第二天早上会眼睛肿。 给自己一个远大的前程和目标。记得常常仰望天空，记住仰望天空的时候也看看脚下。 任何时候，任何人问你，有过多少次恋爱，答案是两次。一次是他爱我，我不爱他。一次是我爱他，他不爱我。好的爱情永远在下一次。别给同一个男人两次伤害你的机会。别相信床上的誓言。别看重处女，但保持纯洁。不要为欲望羞耻，好好享受，但绝不忍受男人的侮辱和怠慢。相信我，妹妹，男人多的是，比三条腿的青蛙多得多。别轻易说出"爱"。相信你的直觉。不要招惹别人的男人，除非你非常非常爱他，并且，他非常非常值得爱。不要招惹寻找与前女友相似，和他母亲、姐姐相似女人的男人。不要招惹浪子、文艺青年和中年男子。别招惹太清纯的男人。别和没心没肺的人在一起。别把犯贱当真爱。一个男人作践自己来取悦你的时候，千万不要因此感动。这个烟头烫在他身上，下一个就可能烫在你身上。看看一个男人的朋友们是什么样的，注意他的朋友们对待女人的态度。还有，千万别相信一个不准备将你介绍给他的朋友圈子的男人。一个男人只肯喊你"宝贝"的时候，坚持要他喊你的名字。一个男人不再来找你的时候，就不要再去找他。不要相信在恋爱上用手段的人。分手时不要口出恶言。吸取教训，但不要后悔。后悔没有用。 别干撕照片、烧信、撕日记这样一类三流爱情电视剧中才有人干的事。 相信爱情，相信好男人还存在，还未婚，还在茫茫人海中寻觅你。别说"男人没一个好东西"这样使别人误以为你阅人无数的话。 答应我，永远不要去做那种午夜背着行李，从一个男朋友家，流落到另一个男朋友家的女人。 爱物质，适当地。永远知道精神更重要。比那些名表、名牌、时装，更加美丽的是你自己。 别瞧不起劳动人民，不要为劳动羞耻。土地不脏，汗味不难闻。请尊重那些似乎生活状况不如你的人，因为这样才是尊重自己。永远体恤那些生活在底层的人们，因为我们的亲人就是在这些人群中。我们不娇贵。 不要小看一分钱。不妨自己去挣挣看。 被朋友伤害了的时候，别怀疑友情，但提防背叛你的人。原谅，但并不遗忘。做人存几分天真童心，对朋友保持一些侠义之情。 要快乐，要开朗，要坚韧，要温暖，这和性格无关。 我担心你太低调，有时要强悍一点，被欺负的时候，一定要讨回来！但是不要记恨。小人之见，随他们去好了。怜悯，会使你高贵。 要原谅这世界和自己。要告诉自己，我值得拥有最好的一切。 15 February 好难每一个人的缘分不同，相爱的时间也会有长短，只有尽心尽力的去做.在错的时间遇上对的人，是一场伤心；在对的时间遇上错的人，是一声叹息；在对的时间遇上对的人，是一生幸福。可是，My sweeties， 好难 10 February V-day is coming!情人节，情人节，又是一年情人节。
我想这个时候的男生女生都会变得很抢手，那些暧昧的人们会急速的扩大这层暧昧，在这个日子能找到一个人和他或者她共度。
我们总是用各种妥协和修饰去填补生活。 3 February 哈哈看了一段话。。。。。。
"俺觉得自己还是有些聪明的.去喜欢那些碰不到又摸不着的人.因为那些人冷落了自己,他找个理由俺就会相信,而那些在我身边的人,俺很容易就能看出他的敷衍,剩下的就是自己想不开,自己让自己痛苦."
无语中。
不是在说我么？ 30 December I had fun, guys, thanks. Hmmm…
I read Helen’s Xanga today. It was way cute. And I come to realize that all my posts are too negative. There is nothing in there about the fun I had, which friend I hung out with, or what places I went to. All that I put there is some inner crap I get from fighting a war with myself.
So, I went out with my friends. To where is not important, as long as I was with my friends. It was easy and relaxing. No worry about what they think about me, no worry about what to say around them. I was myself when I was with them, no pretentious words, and no fake smiles.
We played poker, watched movies, went to karaoke, and chatted about random stuff. I enjoyed every minute spend with them. My dependent natural made me don’t want to leave them anymore. When I dropped Lujie home, and said goodbyes, I was really sad.
Who did I hang out with? Well, there are Amy, Lujie, Helen, Shi, David, Yini, two Jerrys, and Yuan. And I will go out with Shi, Warren, Bryan, and Jennela again. So? I got enough friends, I don’t mind if someone wants to keep distance from me.
Oops, I am trying to be positive here. Anyway, I discovered that I am not an Arcadian anymore (was I ever?). Well, I was lost three times in Arcadia, twice on Boldwin, and once in the mall’s parking lot (yeah, yeah, I know.). I wonder when I can learn these roads. The most embarrassing part is, haha, I got lost when I was right in front of my home. Took a wrong turn and got on i-10, and drove on 605 north, exited on valley, and again a wrong turn took me to i-10 once more. Getting lost is too normal for me, but my car almost ran out of gas then. I was nervous. Hahahahahha, fun experience, next time, fill my tank before going out.
Ohoh, almost forget, I got to see David’s snake!!! And I got to hold it too! It was colder than my hands as David said, and it felt soooooo good holding it. Such an elegant creature, simply beautiful, I would want one myself, but then Kelly, or Shi, would kill me. Lujie was so afraid that she ran away when I was holding it. Hahaha, girls.
Hopefully I can get to see it feeding next time.
Oh, Kelly and I were supposed to light the candles on Xmas eve, but we were both out with friends. And we didn’t get to decorate the Xmas tree. Her father bought a decorated tree. But we did hang up the socks, and Santa left us some money, hahahahaha.
Writing this makes me feel great, yep, I had fun this winter indeed. I was surprised that Helen would think I am wild, because I consider all these quiet and clean fun.
Ah…anyways, Happy new year my dear friends!!
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